For years, I’ve had an emergency, start to recover plan that I implement when I realize depression has crept in again, or when I’m ready to admit it to myself. Sometimes those are at the same time, and sometimes it takes me a little while to really admit I need to take action. There’s a lot of shame that can come from depression or other mental illnesses that can cause delay, even if you know it’s not your fault. If you’re dealing with any sort of mental or other illnesses, I hope you know it’s not your fault.
Depression isn’t a moral failing. It’s not a failure of faith. It’s not failure at all. It is simply a difference in brain chemistry that needs some sort of treatment, be that meds, exercise, or a combination of meds and lifestyle changes. Depression isn’t the same for everyone; we’re not all affected the same way, and we don’t all respond to the same treatments. That’s ok.
Today I implemented my emergency plan. Mine is simple, really, developed over the years by trial and error, changing when I need it to, but it works for me. I don’t always need all of the steps, but it’s a good checklist to get started.
- Ask for help if I need it.
- Pray.
- Drink as close to 8 glasses of water as I can.
- Take meds and vitamins.
- Take a shower, wash hair, and get dressed.
- Remove all expectations of the day.
- Rest if needed.
- Move (a walk, stretching, weight lifting… whatever I can do)
- Survey my environment. Do I need help? Does something need to be done today?
Over the next week, I am gentle with myself but firm. Meds have to have time to take effect, but I must take them. I make an effort to do things, even when I don’t feel like it. But I can’t try to do too much. It’s a balance, a dance if you will, but it’s possible.
I am grateful that I’ve worked really hard to implement systems in my home for keeping up with cleaning, laundry, and meals, so I don’t struggle as much with that stuff as I did in the past. I also tend to spend more time on my environment when depression starts creeping in, because I use cleaning tasks to avoid other things.
My symptoms show up with a lack of exercise, how I feel like a lack of joy or being overly emotional and overwhelmed, and my energy levels plummet. It affects some tasks, like my consistency on this blog, starting new habits, and doing things that take a lot of focus, like taxes.
I don’t want to get bogged down talking about symptoms, but if you need to know the symptoms, then click here.)
If you are suicidal or need help, click here.
If you’re depressed now or have been, if this is an ongoing struggle, you’re not alone. You’re not a failure, and it is not your fault if you struggle with your mental health. There is help out there, but you have to reach out for it if someone hasn’t reached out to you. Please don’t wait for someone to reach out to you. Don’t be afraid to take the first step. Don’t wait. It gets harder when you wait.